Today will be a holiday to remember, today I got my heart torn apart. I don’t know what love is yet but I got a taste of it and now it seems so bittersweet. I cried my eyes out in my friends barn for 4 hours. I don’t know what’s worse. That he said cya for another girl, that he lead me on, or that he said goodbye and dumped me over text. Right now I’m hurting and more than ever I need my friends and something to do tonight. But everyone seems to have plans and if I was realllyy important enough to my friends they’d drop their plans to be with me tonight when I really need them so I’m not crazy depressed like right now. It hurts so bad I wish I didn’t feel anything. I wish I could just get a handle and drink it all so I can just forget everything. I was in too deep and I wish I caught myself sooner. I wish I was good enough for him even though the people around me say he’s a class A douchebag, he’s a really good person and it kills me to have him slip through my fingers. I haven’t felt this low in so long. God help me.